What I learned today

Squirting toothpaste in your eye right before going to bed, when you're body is tense with fatigue is a really stupid thing to do. Such stupidity is enhanced when, instead of cleansing your eye of the chemical burn immediately, the first thought that comes to mind is that this would be a great story to blog about.

Dear Yournamehere,

Seeing as how your Christmas cards are still on top of the drawing board located inside my head, it's pretty safe to say that you probably won't be receiving them before Christmas unless I somehow acquire the ability to travel through time. It's also safe to say that had I the power to travel through time, I'd find better things to do than make sure your Christmas cards are delivered.

So instead, Yournamehere gets an early Christmas well-wishing! With lovely art by Renée Nault!

Portfolio Saturday

Based on how I was feeling yesterday, when I finally decided to head to bed at 4:00am, I should've stayed up till 8:00am and forget about trying to salvage what little sleep I could get before Portfolio Day. That or get a new alarm clock that is at least ten times more obnoxious than my current Kenny doll clock.
I was mortified this morning when I drowsily rubbed my eyes and did a double-take at Kenny the alarm clock, as the mechanical female voice announced that it was 11:23am, about three and a half hours later than I had intended to wake up. It was like my first day of volunteering all over again, except I had only one chance, as Portfolio Day on Granville island only takes place one day of the year for four hours.

As a panic-strickened me paced the bathroom as I brushed my teeth, I gauged that the earliest I could get there would be about 10 to 1:00pm, an hour late for Portfolio Day, three hours later than I would've liked, but it was better than missing portfolio day altogether.

My disaster of a day was worsened when I laid my eyes on the enormous lineup for Emily Carr Institute that has already accumulated by the time I got there, I took my place at the back of the line, which was probably the equivalent of about two city blocks away from the designated assessment area.

For two hours, I waited in that lineup. I was mildly relieved that there was still a large quantity of asipiring artists who lined up after me throughout thoes two hours. We all waited patiently, dealing out the occasional glare of contempt at thoes who had their parents hold a place in the lineup for them.

By the end up what seemed like much longer than a four hour stay at Portfolio Day, I only had the chance to see two art Institutes. The second institute I lined up for (which turned out to be NSCAD) left me in a great spirit, despite the fatigue. So all in all, through a series of unexpected coincidences throughout the day, I had a pretty good experience.

Concerning Sketchbooks

I'm a bit of a sketchbook fiend. Most people around me probably have noticed it, the textbook sized black book I tote around with me like a security blanket. Well, in between all my fiendish sketchbooking, a curious phenomenon happens, where blank pages missing content appear peculiarly in my book between pages. So here I am, at 3:30am trying to fill in the blank pages with whatever lousy excuse of an artistic idea I can conjure up for Portfolio Day tomorrow. It's probably a good idea to head to bed soon, and try to get as much sleep as I can. Can I trust myself to wake up on time? Or should I pull another all-nighter?

Membrane Man

Membrane Man, Membrane Man.
Membrane man hates Villager LaneyCat man.
They have a fight, Membrane wins.
Membrane Man. 

Happy Hallowe'en!

Hallowe'en day homework completed,
Hallowe'en day test studied,
Hallowe'en day dress ready,
I can finally have some Hallowe'en eve sleep

Mollycat

I have a cat named Molly. She's grey and fluffy, and has golden orbs for eyes. 
I get jealous when Molly flirts with other people, but deep down I know Molly still likes me the most.
Me and Molly love each other very much.

Why are pretty red shoes so hard to find?

 

Popcorn Etiquette

I learned something this long weekend: my parents are horrible people to watch movies with.

In between my mom's constant inquiries of questions that would be gradually revealed throughout the film, and my dad's answering of said questions, spoiling of plot twists and revealing of red herrings, some people in this family should really learn the proper etiquette for the consumption of popcorn.

A bowl of popcorn is shared between the audience, you take a handful, and pass it onto the next person beside you in such as way as to not disrupt the movie. Other beverages are to be shared in the same manner, or to be consumed independently.

My parents insisted on sharing a mug of beer. They also insisted on passing along the mug and the bowl of popcorn simultaneously.

As to save room on the arm rest, mother decides to place the bowl of popcorn on top of the mug of bubbly liquid, not for long, just long enough so she can cover herself with a lap blanket, which she pulls out from underneath some pillows rather forcefully.

It was like a chain reaction, you can't stop it. All you can do is stare with popcorn hanging inside your half open jaw.

The corner of the blanket tips the precariously placed popcorn tin over. The popcorn tin tips  the vase of flowers on the side table ever so slightly, thus spilling a mess of wet popcorn and flowers everywhere. The mug that the popcorn had been standing on succeeded in the chain reaction by falling over and crashing obscenely to the ground, and taking a platter that had been placed on the side table earlier that day with it, and causing the butter knife that had been on it to crash and spin violently across the hard tile floor.

We all gawked at the spectacle quietly, after what seemed like a really long minute, my mother laughed.

1111111111111111

11111111z1111zzzzz1zzzI11 wazz11nt111 m11y1zz 11111z111111r11oc1k fro111111111z1m p11111111e1ru11111111z11

Until next time

So it was yet another false alarm. Something like the 119th time give and take a few. And it's all thanks to my bitching and complaining.
This time it was serious. But so were thoes other 118th times.
We'll stay together until next time.

Kittie City 3

 

Kittie City 2

 

Kittie City

 Kitty City by http://www.lusterkaboom.com/

Hello, you don't know me, but I know who you are

"Hey, you don't know me, but I know who you are. "
"So, you're a volunteer too eh? You're a pretty young volunteer, as old as some of my campers. "
"So what school do you go to? Burnaby Mountain? Cool."
"If you went to Burnaby North, that would mean you go to the same school that I do. "
"So, you got a girlfriend?"

Mrao

I like free food, alot.  

Geek

A kid called me a geek today.
Abe: "How do you open the website program?"
Me: START > Programs > Applications > Macromedia Dreamweaver > Voila!
Abe: "Can you help me type in airliners.net?"
Me: "I'm not your maid, type it yourself. It's easy."
Abe: *clumsily types in www.ariliner.net*
Me: *Gets impatient and types it for him*

This is the same kid who got himself stuck in a chair for fifteen minutes during a game of telephone charades. How? That escapes even me. Was it hilarious? Yes, but it made the class go insane and absolutely uncontrollable. Which just reminds me of why I love computer time.

Although computer class usually pertains me scrambling around the classroom answering to needy kids' computer questions, they are such n00bs that they will give me their undivided attentions while watching me copy and paste an image onto Macromedia Dreamweaver, or gawk at my 1337 typing skillz. Also, once they kids get occupied with internet games, It's free time for me, until the inevitable, but always tragic end of class time. Well, it's the end of computer class now, I must now return dutifully to my kids.

Meg White

Who can give me some examples of web browsers?

Ryan: "Who can give me some examples of web browsers?"
Brian: "Google!"
Joey: "Microsoft!"
Kevin: "MSN?"

There's something about a room full of 9-11 year old n00bs in a computer lab playing internet scavenger hunt that's oddly stupid and amusing. Ryan had assigned a list of questions regarding the internet for the little fools to research. Ryan is my hero for being able to keep these kids interested and occupied for the entire class. Even Hank, who has found a liking to lagging behind while the pack traverse from classroom to classroom to ask me personal questions has quieted down and devote all of his... youthful energy to doing these questions.

As I currently write this, I am sitting in the back of a dimly lit computer lab, and making trips around the classroom helping kids use Google. How many email accounts ARE there anyway? That is beyond even my googling skills, but only because it's impossible to find out since about 11'000 new ones are created every friggin day.


Who can tell me, who has the most money in the world?
Bill Gates!
No, Bill Gates is very rich, but he's not the richest person there is. I'm looking for something more like a corporation...
Microsoft!
No...
Firefox!
No, think of a place, that has alot of money to spend on things...
America!
Yes! What part of America?
California?
South America!

lmfao

Well, it's now 10:15, and the kids are getting 15 minutes of free computer time. Man do I not miss the days of Neopets and cartoonnetwork.com. It's almost Rec. time, and my legs are still sore from yesterday, so I probably won't be overly active today.


Hank called me over to show me what Pokemon I am. Apparently I am a Raichu.
Well, it's about time to go, I won't be posting a picture until I get home.

Playing Big Money with watery eyes will cause you to lose the ability to exceed the level of Ditch Digger.